Be Stronger Than What Scares You

Sometimes this is very hard to do especially when you are faced with something that is new, important and something you dreamed off.  At times it feels like the fear is choking the desire to go forward.  

I have a new career opportunity and when I first learned about it late last year I was excited beyond belief.  It was something that I had always wanted to do: to be a teacher trainer.  The opportunity seemed so fabulous and I was willing to do anything to make it a reality.  Then as time went on the problems started arising and the little fear of failure in this exciting opportunity became bigger and bigger.  

Two days before my first presentation I found out that the presentation I had been working on for the last week needed a different focus, so I went back to the drawing board and literally spent the whole day and night reworking it and practicing.  I went to the presentation stressed and horrified, because I didn't feel ready with the new material.  I prayed my heart out, had my grandmother, who is a miracle worker, praying up to the last minute.  While I was at the presentation things continued to change, first it seemed like there would be five people, then maybe only two, at the end ten persons came.

Everything went relatively well except the music.  I had not embedded the music into the PowerPoint and so going out of the presentation to play the music became a problem. But I got through it.  I had wanted so much to call it off, to tell my boss I am not ready, you do it, but I kept on hoping and praying and pushing through.

This taught me that I needed to be STRONGER than my fear of failing.  Being strong paid off because I didn't let myself down and now that experience of pushing through helps me push through other times when I am afraid.

Has there been a time when you were afraid, but pushed through you fears? Please share, knowing that others are also afraid, but they chose to be STRONGER than what scared them helps us to know that we can do it too.

He is Not That Into You

Wise words, but do we really take them in.  They are so simple and yet it's difficult to grasp their meaning and much more difficult to accept.  When we like someone, we feel that the feeling is reciprocal and at times it is. Yet we find it difficult to accept that it might not be with the same intensity or for the same goal.

Many hearts would be spared if we could only keep those words in mind when we are trying to decipher if someone is responding to our feelings.  One friend told me a good way was to "Listen to their actions and not their words."  This advice resounded with me and helped me end a relationship where the person was not really that into me. At least not in the way that I wanted, not in the way that his lips where saying he was.

It's hard to accept that someone you are so into is not really that into you. However if you take a step back and look at his actions it becomes clear.  What are they saying? Are they playing the cat and mouse game or are their words consistent with their actions?  If their words do not match their actions you need to take a hard look at the relationship and make a choice: Is this all you want in your life? Would you rather be in a relationship where you don't have wonder if they are into you or not?

When a person is committed to the relationship you can feel it. It is a feeling of peace, calm. It is a feeling of strength and energy to pursue other interests. It is far from that feeling of angst you have when the person is not that committed. If you feel like the relationship is taking all your energy, you never know what to expect, you don't know where you stand and you have to keep feeding the meter in order to get a response then you don’t have commitment.

There is someone for you. Yet there is no room for the right person to come into your life if you are spending time and energy with someone, who is not committed to you.

You have the right to a healthy, committed relationship.  You have the right to feel loved and cared for.  Believe this in your heart and don't settle for less.