Wise words, but do we really take them in. They are so
simple and yet it's difficult to grasp their meaning and much more difficult to
accept. When we like someone, we feel that the feeling is reciprocal and
at times it is. Yet we find it difficult to accept that it might not be with
the same intensity or for the same goal.
Many hearts would be spared if we could
only keep those words in mind when we are trying to decipher if someone is
responding to our feelings. One friend told me a good way was to "Listen
to their actions and not their words." This advice resounded with me
and helped me end a relationship where the person was not really that into me. At
least not in the way that I wanted, not in the way that his lips where saying
he was.
It's hard to accept that someone you are
so into is not really that into you. However if you take a step back and look
at his actions it becomes clear. What are they saying? Are they playing
the cat and mouse game or are their words consistent with their actions?
If their words do not match their actions you need to take a hard look at
the relationship and make a choice: Is this all you want in your life? Would
you rather be in a relationship where you don't have wonder if they are into
you or not?
When a person is committed to the
relationship you can feel it. It is a feeling of peace, calm. It is a feeling
of strength and energy to pursue other interests. It is far from that feeling
of angst you have when the person is not that committed. If you feel like the
relationship is taking all your energy, you never know what to expect, you
don't know where you stand and you have to keep feeding the meter in order to
get a response then you don’t have commitment.
There is someone for you. Yet there is no
room for the right person to come into your life if you are spending time and
energy with someone, who is not committed to you.
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